DON'T do it for the kids

There is much which could be said about the following observation... And a better writer could likely spin it together with oddly-similar anecdotes and craft a profound funny and poignant unifying theme.

But alas, you're stuck with me, and so I'm just going to say that this is a pretty funny.

I was at a children's museum with my family today. I love museums like this, and not because I get to spend quality time with my son(though that is important), but because, frankly, there's some pretty cool stuff there. Attendance at such a place is a real perk of fatherhood....how else could I get to play with a giant bubble machine without looking like a total weirdo.

At any rate, while at said museum, I witnessed something which I can only say borders on child abuse. There was a child, who by all accounts looked healthy and happy; he was accompanied by his doting mother and typically-aloof father. I thought nothing of the kid until I noticed it....

The kid's collar was popped.

Pardon my acronyms...but WTF?

First of all, who came up with popped collars in the first place? Was someone at the country club so concerned with yuppy vampires that they felt compelled to place some solid Ralph Lauren cotton around their neck? Or did we as as society just need one more way to look like a total d-bag. But more to the point, why subject your child to the inevitable mocking he will endure circa ten years from now?

If you want to engage in this strange Danny Zuko meets Judge Smails fashion faux pas, be my guest.

But keep it to yourself...for the children's sake.

Conflicts of Good Advice

I have been given a lot of advice over the years...

My two favorites pieces are both wonderfully vague and ambiguous, just as truly good advice often is.

They are: 

"Be kind" 

"Be authentic"

But what happens when two really great pieces of advice come into conflict with one another?

Let me expound...

A friend of mine recently created some art(I mean this in the most general way possible)  He was quite proud of it and clearly had put in a great deal of time and effort into this endeavor.  He proceeded to go on Facebook and, with appropriate pride, ask everyone to behold said art and to offer their respective opinions.

Like a good friend, Facebook or otherwise, I did.

It was bad....like...really bad.  I don't posture to be an artist or to be an expert in art.  Hell, I routinely ask you poor people to read my feeble attempts at humor in much the same way.  But as least I know it's bad, whereas I doubt the friend in question knew the depths of this suckiness.  To make matters even worse....He asks ME specifically for "feedback."  Which is to say that he wanted ME to tell him how awesome it was.

So here's where the advice thing gets tricky....I could "be kind" and tell him how awesome it was and how moved I was by his effort.  None of this is patently false, of course, if by awesome you mean terrible.  

Or I could be "authentic" and tell him the truth.  No sugar coating, just honesty.  

Which is what I did...and it went...badly.

"Geez man, you could've just said nothing." Was, minus a few explatives, the response which I got to my "authentic" feedback.

So, there you have it....all my pondering...for naught.